a window into my soul…
The week before exams and I really need to buckle down and start studying!! There are some of us who keep up with all their readings during the semester (Cough cough.. keeners).. then there are those of us who leave all our readings until a couple days before the exam (guilty!!). And although I know fully well that I am going to be cramming and pulling all-nighters if I don’t get started, me being my OCD self decided that I needed to vacuum my room before I got started. Well one thing lead to another and I was off on one of my MAD cleaning tangents!! I steam-mopped the entire floor, re-organized all my jewelry, refolded and re-hung all my clothes, created a Hijab organizer (shall blog about that one day!), and finally dusted all my dressers and shelves. It was a very productive day.. in a very unproductive way.
When I finally got to dusting my bookshelf, my heart broke. There lay my Quran atop its wooden rihal… COVERED in a thick layer of dust. And yes I find it very embarrassing and heart wrenching to say it, but it happened. I couldn’t even bring myself to clean off the dust, I felt like I was somehow lying to myself. I was trying to show the world (although no one sees my bookshelf except for me and maybe my family now and then) that I didn’t neglect My Quran. I tried to rationalize it at first. “well I haven’t even done my school readings so how would I have time to read the Quran?”. But reality is that there was the pressure of exams right around the corner that would force me to eventually do my uni readings. They would get done because I want to make sure that I am prepared for my tests.
There just isn’t the same kind of pressure for reading the Quran in our lives.. or is there? YES!! there is!! I thought about it deeply as I continued to dust off old biology textbooks and magazines. Our lives will all come to an end eventually and what (readings) have we done to prepare? the only reason we don’t feel that pressure is because Allah’s registrars office does not release a regular schedule. Although that would be great – “Tasneem’s test of life Time: 9:00am-11:00am Date: Friday (some specific date, I’d rather not foretell) Location: the stretched out plaines of earth”. Allah hasn’t given us an exact date, but he has warned us many times that death will surly come. Unknown when it will actually come but we are assured that it can happen at any moment. just like the dust on my Quran and like he dust we were made of, we shall once again become dust. So why don’t we prepare ourselves constantly for The Day (message to myself first and foremost)? The fact of the matter is that the life we are currently living IS the test and Allah, through his infinite mercy has given us all the necessary tools to succeed. He has made it an open-book test! (I mean can it get any easier than that??) The Quran is life’s textbook. In any moment, whether it be happiness, sadness, difficulty, loss this book has all the answers to sooth our souls in this life and save our souls in the next inshaAllah.
Let us all make the intention from today to read the Quran regularly and never allow it to reach a state where it is simply a piece of decoration on our bookshelves. The Quran is a book that never stops teaching. Reading it once does not mean that you have reaped all the benefits it has too offer. The more it is read, the more wisdom we gain and the closer we become to our Creator. May Allah make us amongst those who seek His love and mercy Ameen!
– Your sister in Islam, T